Chapter 24 – Every Day the Protagonist Wants to Capture Me
Chapter 24 Immortal Sword Congress
Xie Xi turned his head in silence, it looked as if he was angry. However, he did not stay angry for very long. The temporary vigor that the wine gave him kindled for just a moment before quickly running out and he fell asleep on the stone table, on his stomach.
Chu Yu poked Xie Xi’s face, to confirm that he really was asleep. He got up with a sigh, and walked down to tend to the maple tree in his courtyard.
He looked up at the maple for a while then took out the thin maple leaf he had picked up before. Taking out a brush and ink, he wrote “Chu Yu.” He then bent down and dug a small hole under the maple tree to bury the leaf in.
After he finished doing all of this, Chu Yu examined his accumulated points again. He was cheated out of a lot of points when he bought the manual on how to pick up girls so his total score had fallen down a deep pit. The recent plot developments had garnered both praise and criticism. The points rose and fell until they finally settled at 188, which is so far away from 1,000 points that it seems impossible to achieve.
… Yet, though it is popular all over China,1 at this point not dying would be counted as a triumph.
Chu Yu let out a melancholic sigh. He didn’t notice that behind him the supposedly drunk and collapsed Xie Xi had straightened up. The younger disciple was staring intently at Chu Yu with his hands propped up under his chin, toying with the cup that Chu Yu had drunk from, eyes clear and quiet.
They stayed in the Falling Maple Leaf Valley for two days then Chu Yu decided to begin their journey to Linlan where the Immortal Sword Congress was to be held.
Chu Sheng personally sent off Chu Yu, with tears in his eyes, giving him ten thousand warnings and instructions, as though he was marrying off his younger sister instead of merely sending his younger brother off.
The distance from the Falling Maple Leaf Valley to the border of Linlan was very far. On the basis of Chu Yu and Xie Xi’s current speed, that although they were in a rush they would arrive at the Immortal Sword Congress just when it was about to begin.
Chu Yu sent a message to Lu Qingan ahead of time and asked him to keep their arrival a secret. Song Jinyi still thought that they were already dead. It would be nice to give him a surprise when the moment comes at the Immortal Sword Congress.
This time Chu Yu didn’t want to delay so he didn’t play around. Instead, in a diligent and quiet way, he flew on his sword. However, Xie Xi took the opportunity to speak, saying: “Da Shixiong.”
Chu Yu: “Hmm?”
“Shidi wants to practice martials arts skills.”
“It’s not good to be distracted while flying …”
“Shidi wants to try out the skills from Shixiong’s new book. Shixiong isn’t stingy, right?”
Chu Yu: “…”
That annoying manual on how to pick up girls! It was nothing but a useless item. Not to mention, that erotic drawing on the cover … surely the protagonist doesn’t think that Chu Yu has some sort of special hobby, does he?
He was at a loss for a bit but then a sudden flash of insight made everything clear to him.
The important thing isn’t the cover, it’s the content! The protagonist wants to read the manual, this is a good thing!
Chu Yu took out the manual and handed it to Xie Xi. Without turning a hair, Chu Yu spoke some sheer nonsense: “Shidi should carefully think over the contents of this book. When you meet a person that you like, although this method teaches various methods of making others fall in love with you, a gentleman does not marry lightly.”2
He remembered that Xie Xi doesn’t like this type of speech. Chu Yu was worried but when he cautiously examined Xie Xi’s expression, he concluded that the other person was smiling and looked very happy.
Xie Xi: “Oh? Is that so?”
The child is in a good mood.
Chu Yu thought happily that he was succeeding in hugging the thighs and beamed from ear to ear.
There were two days of smiles then Chu Yu couldn’t smile anymore. Although the two of them were excellent disciples that stood out from all their fellows, they were only at the Foundation Building stage. Their spirit power is limited so they had to rest every few days. Early one morning, Chu Yu woke up at the inn that they were staying in for a short while. The person who had been holding onto his waist was gone.
When he opened his eyes in confusion, he saw a fine bottle on the opposite table. He noticed that there was a bouquet of sweet-scented osmanthus in it. He stared at the flowers silently for a moment, while wondering where they had come from. Xie Xi then came in, carrying breakfast.
Seeing that Chu Yu was awake, Xie Xi’s shy, tender, young face showed a clean and pure smile
Chu Yu gave him a smile while shivering.
“You’re awake?” Xie Xi walked to his bedside and stroked Chu Yu’s messy hair softly with gentle eyes
Face! Face! Face! Too close! Don’t put your face so close to mine! Ahh!!!
Chu Yu’s eyebrows shot up. He raised his hand to feel Xie Xi’s forehead to check if he had a fever but his hand was captured.
Xie Xi looked deep into Chu Yu’s eyes then lowered his head and lightly kissed Chu Yu’s palm. His lips were warm and soft.
Chu Yu: “…”
He remembered something.
Isn’t this a strategy from that Flirting with Girls manual?!!
The protagonist is trying to learn and dares to practice his skills by playing with someone?
Chu Yu burst out in anger. Regardless of the fact that this was the protagonist he had to flatter, Chu Yu twisted Xie Xi’s arm behind his back and rolled him over until he had the younger chest down. Then Chu Yu took off Xie Xi’s pants.
The shocked Xie Xi stared at Chu Yu with wide eyes: “Da Shixiong?”
Chu Yu looked at the protagonist’s tender white buttocks. His heart was full of courage. He slapped it.
Xie Xi made an “ah” sound but it wasn’t a scream, it was more like he was patiently enduring a wrong. After a pause, he said in an aggrieved tone: “Shixiong, why did you hit me?”
Chu Yu slapped down again, finally finding his dignity as a Shixiong. He said coldly: “You’ve got some guts to dare to make use of your Shixiong as a pastime. Did I not say you should not play around??”3
“…” Xie Xi was silent for a while. His eyes were red and he sniffled. He said in an even more aggrieved tone: “Shixiong deceived me.”
Chu Yu rolled his eyes then slapped him again. A few more red handprints appeared on Xie Xi’s white buttocks. Perhaps because of the pain, Xie Xi made some sounds then tried to twist himself free of Chu Yu’s hold.
Looking at Xie Xi’s beaten red buttocks, abruptly an evil desire welled up and Chu Yu gently pinched it.
Xie Xi shivered then suddenly broke free of Chu Yu’s hold. He quickly pulled up his pants and ran out of the room.
Chu Yu was speechless: “…”
Looking down at his extremely audacious hands, cold sweat suddenly started dripping down. The protagonist was like a lamb, obedient and well-behaved, which made Chu Yu too careless and arrogant. He was courting disaster.
Chu Yu was anxious and fearful. Now that Xie Xi had been spanked, will he hold a grudge and think back on the old and recent slights he suffered?
… When Xie Xi comes back later, should he take off his pants and let Xie Xi give him a beating? Chu Yu nervously waited in his room from morning to evening until Xie Xie to come back to the inn. Looking at Xie Xi’s expression, it was unexpectedly cheerful.
Looking at Chu Yu, Xie Xi’s face flushed a little. He bit his lip when he saw that Chu Yu looked the same as he did every morning, sitting in bed with his hair all messy. Xie Xi smiled and asked: “Shixiong, why haven’t you gotten up?”
He’s not angry?
Chu Yu was almost moved to tears. He jumped off the bed, quickly out on his robe, and laughed hollowly: “I was waiting for Shidi to come back.”
Xie Xi smiled strangely: “Waiting in bed for Shidi?”
Chu Yu was on the verge of saying what was on his mind when he realized that the feeling of the words somehow did not seem quite rightHe promptly shut up and shoved his hair aside. He complained: “It would be good to be a monk. This long hair is just too troublesome.”
(TN: Buddhist monks shave their heads. Chinese people in olden times said that they got their hair from their parents and it was disrespectful to cut it. You can imagine how long a cultivator’s hair will be if they never cut it for hundreds of years.)
With Chu Yu’s avoidance of the subject and changing of the topic, Xie Xi’s mood became better. He took out a peach-wood comb and laughed, saying: “Shixiong, don’t move, Shidi will help you take care of it.”
Chu Yu was overwhelmed by the unexpected favour and sat quietly as the protagonist attended to him gently. A sense of guilt rose up and he said in a small voice: “Shidi, this morning Shixiong was overly excited, don’t get angry.”
Xie Xi paused his action and he said in a casual manner: “I’m not angry. If Shixiong wants to play, he can do it any time.”
Chu Yu’s eyebrows rose. He felt that something was a little off. Xie Xi’s movements were slow and Chu Yu was bored so he opened the comment screen.
His eyes were flooded with comments saying “Hope you remain a devoted couple to the end!”4
Chu Yu: “…”
He decided not to read the comment barrage anymore.
Immortal Sword Congress is held by the Yu Hua Sect in the neighboring Lancang territory. Yu Hua Sect is similar to Tian Yuan Sect; it is also one of the biggest sects in the cultivation world and has roughly the same status.
The Immortal Sword Congress is to be held at Yu Hua Sect for two reasons. First, because of its strength. Second, because the entrance to the Mausoleum Ruins is in Linlan.
The eight great sects each occupy a territory that is abundant in spiritual strength. During the Immortal Sword Congress, all of the big sects will send people to participate. In addition, there are also some small sects that also send their disciples, hoping to get lucky.
Chu Yu and Xie Xi arrived just in time. The Immortal Sword Congress will start tomorrow so tonight they have some time to catch their breath.
Each sect was given a separate place to rest in Yu Hua Sect. Chu Yu looked at the boundless night under the Yu Hua Sect’s main gate, he was not confident that he would be able to sneak inside. Therefore he took out a piece of paper, muttered a few words over it, then threw it up.
Not long after, Lu Qingan came out.
As usual, he was wearing pure white clothes, and looked as though he was floating above the mortal world. His face was grave and stern as he nodded slightly when he saw Chu Yu and asked: “Yu-er, are you injured?”
Chu Yu respectfully bowed his head: “No, Shizun, please don’t be concerned.”
Lu Qingan then turned his eyes to examine Xie Xi’s body, but they both knew it was his way of hiding his relief.
His nature is silent so he didn’t speak again. He merely waved his sleeves to bring two people with him to fly inside the sect’s main gate.
Yuan Chen Peak had only sent one person, Third Shidi. Chu Yu didn’t want to conceal himself so he went into the room and called “Third Shidi.” The person who had bowed his head to solemnly drink his tea was shocked and spat out a mouthful of his tea.
He squealed in a high tone “ahhh!” and jumped up. Trembling from head to toe, he pointed at Chu Yu and said: “Shi … Shizun, Da Shixiong’s spirit has returned, did I call him back from the dead?”
With a black face, Chu Yu flicked his forehead a few times.5
Third Shidi was overjoyed and embraced Chu Yu, while screaming with excitement. Lu Qingan stood watching them from the doorway for a long time then said in an impassive tone: “Yu-er and Xi-er have traveled a long way, go and rest.”
Chu Yu cupped his hands in respect6 to Lu Qingan, nodded to Third Shidi, then pulled the the black-faced Xie Xi away.
Before they arrived, he had written to Lu Qingan about the entire process of development. Since Lu Qingan didn’t say anything, then he wouldn’t talk about it either.
Tomorrow they would be fighting against the elite disciples of the other sects. In the book, Chu Yu was stabbed only a few chapters after this event. Sitting mournfully on the bedding, he grabbed Xie Xi and rubbed his head, sighing: “Shidi, if we meet Song Jingyu in a match tomorrow, we don’t have to be too polite but neither should we be too rude. We shouldn’t give him an excuse to say that we are hurting the harmony of the sect.”
Xie Xi nodded obediently.
Because Chu Yu and Xie Xi had not yet arrived, Lu Qingan was the one who entered their names for the contest. The other elders tried to comfort him, saying that he shouldn’t take the loss of his disciples too much to heart or waste his peak’s allotted slots for the contest. Therefore, when the other peak’s elders saw the two people behind Lu Qingan at the start of the Immortal Sword Congress, they were all surprised.
The one who was the most shocked was Song Jingyi who was standing behind Song Yuanzhuo.
He obviously wanted to come over and check if those two were really Chu Yu and Xie Xi. He gave them a nasty look then whispered something in Song Yuanzhuo’s ear.
Song Yuanzhuo, with a face full of smiles and his eyes flashing, said: “Lu Shidi, you are too unkind. Since Chu Shizhi and Xie Shizhi are fine, why didn’t you tell me? You let us grieve for nothing.”
Lu Qingan said with an impassive face: “You are surprised that my disciples returned safely?”
Song Yuanzhuo said, smiling: “Naturally, I am surprised.”
Lu Qingan turned his face away and said in a calm voice: “I just wanted to surprise you.”
An abnormal silence descended over the entire place.
- Oh my gosh, I nearly died laughing. XX tried the flirting strategies with CY and Da Shixiong spanked his butt for being a naughty boy. *rolling on the floor laughing*
- Please let me know if there are any errors. Leave a comment … I would love to know what you think of this chapter. 😀
- 大江南北 – lit. north and south sides of the Yangtze River, figuratively “all over China”
- 非君不嫁 – lit – a gentleman does not marry. I added “lightly” since the literal phrase seems incomplete in English
- 你说你该不该打 – eh? Shouldn’t hit back Shixiong maybe? Not quite sure what he is saying here.
- 白头偕老 – reach old age together; live to a ripe old age in conjugal bliss; live together until old age
- 栗爆 – lit “burst chestnut” (a chestnut burst after it was heated/cooked) but in this case it’s an idiom like 栗暴 meaning “hit a human head with a curved finger or fist.” I substituted an English phrase for it instead of a literal translation.
- 拱手 – the usual gesture you see in Kung Fu movies, when a person puts one open palm over a fist