Chapter One – The Prince’s Loyal Lover

Translator’s Introduction: Because of the strict censorship laws in China, this type of fiction uses a lot of euphemisms/coded words.

Chrysanthemum – the lower orifice, “backdoor”

Cucumber, little brother, etc. – d*ck

Shou (uke) – the “bottom” in the relationship, also called 0

Gong (seme) – the “top” in the relationship

Loyal dog shou – this is a type of character in BL fiction. A 100% loyal, honest, and devoted shou, he will endure anything and everything for his loved one. Sometimes, it borders on being masochistic

Scum gong – one of the most popular types of gong characters. Basically, the “bad boy” type, their actions often border on the abusive.

Eat tofu – to take advantage of another person

********

Table of Contents        Next Chapter

Chapter One: That loyal dog shou

Reality is very cruel. Tao Wen, who had gloriously ascended to the rank of magician, finally found a person who was like him. He had set the stage for their earth-shaking love affair, planning to lose his virginity. After shyly asking the other person to take off his clothes and roll in the sheets with him, he suddenly realized that … they were both 0.

D***n! If he had known, he wouldn’t have cheerfully paid for the room himself!

How come in novels, there were always more cucumbers than chrysanthemums? Many people were always scrambling to be the gong.

But in reality, chrysanthemums are more numerous than cucumbers. Finding a good gong wasn’t easy.

Tao Wen sadly said goodbye to the person he had planned to roll in the sheets with who likewise looked very sad, too. They agreed that in the future they would become best buds. Then Tao Wen dejectedly went online and started looking for novels.

The world of novels was always wonderful. After Tao Wen’s shou setback in the real world, he liked to find a warm, fluffy novel with no tragedy tag to comfort and soothe his wounded soul. His favorite type of character was definitely the loyal dog shou.

Browsing novels, Tao Wen found a novel with the “loyal dog shou” tag. In the absence of a gong, he can make do with a shou. Tao Wen started reading it enthusiastically.

The author’s writing was very good but she was definitely the type who likes to make readers cry.1 Tao Wen read it sorrowfully. If it weren’t for the loyal dog shou, who he liked very much, he wouldn’t have been able to stand it. But since he loved the loyal dog shou character so much, he persevered. From the perspective of an omniscient reader, he felt that the scum gong was really too bad. He desperately wanted to soothe his heart but now he felt like it was going to be broken.

However, even if there were some misunderstandings and drama in the middle of the novel, as long as the outcome was a happy ending, Tao Wen will be satisfied. However, Tao Wen didn’t expect that just when the scum gong finally realized that he loved the shou, his favorite loyal dog shou died! He really died!

It was a bad ending! His beloved loyal dog shou was abused by the scum gong. After he died, the scum gong repented but was killed by his older brother, the emperor.

This ****ing ending! Tao Wen looked at the computer screen and wanted to become a ghost to haunt the author! Is there anything more frustrating than this? In order to save that scum gong, the shou was injured but remained loyal. Just because of a few words spoken by other people the scum gong misunderstood and felt betrayed. It’s too much!

Of course, in the end, the scum gong found out the truth. Tao Wen thought that things wouldn’t be so difficult but the shou died… The author clearly wrote this to get revenge on society!

Well, if he had a secret guard who was so loyal and devoted to him, he certainly wouldn’t be like the prince in the novel! Nor would he be so brainless as to offend his immediate superior and thus make the emperor look at him with displeasure in his eyes, resulting in harm to his secret guard and himself.

He… would surely get naked and seduce his secret guard! Ah no, if the guard was seduced, then instead of being stabbed, Tao Wen would have to do the stabbing …

When he thought of this scenario, Tao Wen was extremely depressed again because he is a shou. He was very happy when he finally found someone to take his virginity, only to find out that the other person was also a shou. What a tragedy!

With a heavy heart, Tao Wen lay down on his bed. Since it was cold, he plugged in the electric blanket…

In the end, Tao Wen had no desire to find out if he was electrocuted or burned. All he knew was that he died in the only thing his parents had left for him, in the small 50-square-foot house.

Table of Contents        Next Chapter

  1. 后妈 – literally “stepmother” but it’s a slang for writers who like to write very tragic stories that make readers cry

32 thoughts on “Chapter One – The Prince’s Loyal Lover”

  1. At first i was confused on exactly what kind of setting is this, what with the prota becoming a magician, and I gotta say that it took me too long to understand that it was a reference to a meme about being an old virgin… I gotta brush up on my meme-knowledge.

  2. How could they not know they were shous? Didn’t one of them seduce the other?!

    Oh, I feel you, bro. Tragedies are the worst!!! Only when it has a happy ending they’re perfect.

    Thanks for the translation!

  3. Thanks for the trans.
    What a start! 2 shous and no gong… I can’t help wondering about that other poor Shou. Losing his new friend like that! 😆

  4. i must say, tragedy novel is definitely bitter but most of them are really good in process. That’s really a shame. i have became more and more masocistic lately, bullying myself with reading such story.
    Thanks for your hardworks!!!!

  5. LoL, i thought he avoided tragedy tags, yet he read tragedy novel, is the tragedy tag hidden or he just happened to miss it or something? That’s cruel and it’s happened to me too once.. *cue: cold sands, my traumatic bl story ever* still good read tho.
    Oh well..
    Thanks for the chap 💞 💞 💞

  6. Thank you! I can’t wait to read the rest.
    But what does it mean in the opening paragraph when it says that the MC, ‘ascended to the rank of magician’? Is this code for anything? Or in a game?

    1. It’s a meme that virgins become magicians after twenty years. Or something like that.

  7. So another mc who is the bottom, rare to find one that isn’t. Well as long as it’s sweet and gives my lonely self a smile to my face.
    Looking forward to this too bad it’s extremely short

  8. This seems to promise without extending, although five chapters seems short, but I will enjoy reading.
    Thanks for sharing
    I love your work but almost never said it 👏👏👏

  9. Rays, I feel like he’s going to disappoint again I’d rather not find a cucumber 😂😂

  10. Thank you so much, hehe, sorry to bother you, I would ask permission to translate this novel into Indonesian, can I tanslator-sama?

    I will put credit your link website, as translator china-english.

    Thank you before 🙂
    Have a nice day translator-sama

    1. Someone already asked to translate it in the index page. Maybe you two can help each other?

  11. Once upon a time, there was a shou who was really thirsting for some shake.

    Now, everybody knows that a shake is made up of one chrysanthemum, one cucumber, and lots and lots of milk. This shou already had a chrysanthemum and the milk was dependent on the cucumber—the bigger and the better the shape, the more milk he’ll get. But dammit—everytime he went out, all he saw were chrysanthemums! A whole field of them! He already had one, okay? And it will wilt at this rate if he didn’t get any shake soon…

    And that was how this shou decides to go on an adventure to nab himself a big, fresh cucumber…

    1. This novel will really be tragic if MC reincarnates after much drama and near-death experiences and angst and blood and tears, he finds out that the ML is still a shou at the end of the story…😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Leave a Comment - Name, email, and website are NOT required