Chapter 34.2 The Reader and Protagonist Definitely Have to Be in True Love

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Chapter 34.2 – Author: Choose a good rival, this is a lifetime thing.

Du Ze’s feelings for the rival are complicated. Yi Ye Zhi Qiu described Eric this way: Blond hair like sunshine, handsome, promising, possessing all the virtues – it’s deja vu! Ah! The description is exactly how the protagonist was like before he blackened. Author, you are deliberately provoking the readers! Do you want this reader to cry? This young man will really cry!

Every time he saw the rival in “Mixed Blood,” Du Ze always thought: If I had not gone to the comment section to get attention from the author, would the protagonist be the same as the rival? And the f**king author was simply inhuman: in “Mixed Blood,” the protagonist is trying to destroy the world while his rival is trying to stop him.

The readers were in a muddle.

F**k, which one is the lead, which one is the villain?!

The ones who were the most excited about the similarities and differences between the protagonist and his rival was a group of ladies and sisters. Du Ze’s line of sight began to slide away. Although the character inside the doujinshi and the real person weren’t the same, the thought of the scene inside the doujinshi where the rival cried “pull it out ~”,¹ some silly, cute person couldn’t look directly at the rival.

The last one to walk into sight was an elf with a bow and arrow. Du Ze looked at the elf, who was as beautiful as the rumors had said, and thought that the plot god was truly hardworking and dedicated: since the protagonist had not joined the mercenary team, it found an elf to fill the missing slot so that the mercenary team will have five members, just like in “Mixed Blood.”

Honey, who was sitting on Bart’s shoulder, saw the flaxen-haired Xiu behind Du Ze.

“There’s a kid ~” The little girl waved excitedly: “Look, look!”

Eric looked where Honey indicated, and when he saw Du Ze, his eyes flashed and a very sunny smile appeared.

“We are the Gold mercenary team, I am captain Eric.” Eric sheathed his sword as if to say that he had no evil intentions: “You are?”

Old John did not speak, he was waiting for Xiu’s instructions; Xiu did not speak, he was lying silently on the back of Du Ze; Du Ze did not speak, some silly Moe person cannot overcome his social barrier.

In the face of the Silent Regiment, Eric was a bit surprised but not discouraged. He took a step towards Du Ze and insisted: “Can you tell me your name?”

The scope of his attention had narrowed to “you.” Du Ze looked at Eric and thought that the mercenary captain was looking at Xiu who was behind Du Ze. His heart was filled with admiration: to find the protagonist so easily, Eric is really worthy of being the protagonist’s biggest rival.

Some stupid reader suddenly felt like a third wheel. This was clearly the protagonist and his rival’s fateful first encounter so for Du Ze to be here is too improper. However, at this time Du Ze felt a pair of hands encircling his neck from the back.

Xiu held Du Ze and looked straight at the handsome young blond man. “Why should I tell you?”

His voice revealed a strong discontent, but with his soft, white appearance, it was more like a child losing his temper.

When the mercenary team saw Xiu, they were astonished. Enoch rubbed his eyes repeatedly. “I, I actually saw a legendary gnome.”

“Stupid Enoch! Now that the Demons have appeared, there is nothing strange about a gnome appearing, too.” Honey’s attention was caught and her eyes were reluctant to leave Xiu. “He is so cute ~ small, soft, tender, the gnome is so cute ~”

The little girl slapped the warrior’s brawny shoulder: “I declare that this lady in love today.”

Bart, with a wry smile, said to Honey: “Miss, the gnome looks small, but he should be twice as old as you.”

The elf glanced at the Xiu and Du Ze and looked at the hands that circled the latter’s neck silently.

Eric also looked somewhat surprised when he saw that the person opposite him was exuding hostility. He still smiled very genially: “I just want to get to know you …”

“We don’t want to get to know you.” Xiu bluntly interrupted Eric’s words, firmly rejecting his offer: “Now, you have a quarter of an hour to get out of here.”

Eric was a little startled. The flaxen-haired gnome whose hands tightly held onto the black-haired youth was acting as though he was a child who was scared that other people would steal his beloved toy, pushing other people away from his turf. Eric didn’t have time to say anything before Enoch rolled up his sleeves. “The gnome is so unpleasant that I want to teach him a lesson!”

Xiu smiled and his eyes curved like crescent moons, his small dimples unusually sweet.

“There are five minutes left. Then you die.”

******

******

Xiu took the mercenary card from the receptionist. As he was just about to leave the mercenary guild, he heard someone behind him shouting.

“Hey! Look, there’s an elf who also took on the Gnome Ruins mission!” That voice was getting nearer. “The elf in front, please wait, brother!”

Xiu kept on moving until a rogue jumped in front of him. The burglar saw Xiu’s cold, handsome face, and suddenly froze like an elephant struck by petrification magic. Xiu was about to walk past him when two people appeared in front of him. It was a brawny man and a little girl. The little girl was about 12 years old and she was looking at the Xiu with sparkling eyes.

“You are beautiful, ah ~ The Elves are so beautiful ~” The little girl pulled at the brawny man’s clothes: “I declare that this lady in love today.”

The brawny man smiled wryly. “Miss, although the elf is very beautiful, his age should be several times yours.”

Xiu’s face was expressionless as he looked at this group of people. At this time, a blond youth walked over and stopped in front of Xiu. His eyes flashed with a glimmer of appreciation.

“I’m so sorry, my teammates are very impulsive,” he said. The blond youth looked sorry as he smiled brightly at Xiu. “My name is Eric. This is my mercenary squad. We’re going to explore the Gnome Ruins, too. Would you like to join us?”

– excerpt from “Mixed Blood”

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The author has something to say:

Protagonist: Henceforth, you are my rival. (Seizes the reader)

Readers: … What’s wrong?!

Protagonist: Let’s go fight. (Drags him to bed)

Author: Choose a good rival (to sleep with),² this is a lifetime thing. = =+

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1. “一库~” – if you read this literally, it’s “one storehouse” but I believe the author was just using homonyms. If you read it out loud it’s “yī kù.” I can’t be sure of the meaning though. It could be “stop it” or “underpants.” I just choose the most common phrase reluctant ukes yell in doujins.
2. 选一个好宿（lao）敌（po）吧. A play on words. 好宿敌 means good old enemy/good rival but if you separate it, 好宿 also means a good place to sleep. 宿 means a lot of things and it can also be pronounced as Xiù.