Chapter 3 – When a Fanfic Protagonist Transmigrated into the Original Novel
Zhangsun Zijun’s mood was very bad. By now he couldn’t count the number of Yi Xichen’s miscarriages. On several occasions, it was because he was too wild and the child couldn’t handle their violent activities. In fact, he didn’t want to but the fanfic author had made his character turn into the personification of a savage beast whenever he saw Yi Xichen.
Sometimes the miscarriages were caused by villainous female minor characters who slipped abortifacient drugs into his food or drink. Fortunately, Yi Xichen was like a well-plowed plot of land and sowing will be rewarded.1 But why is it always this way? Zhangsun Zijun was very annoyed.
If he wants to give birth, whether it’s a ball or an egg, then quickly give birth! If he doesn’t want to give birth, then why continue to get pregnant?2
Although Zhangsun Zijun’s nether regions were on fire, he ignored it because Yi Xichen’s child was …
****. Now that the child was gone, the miscarriage must have hurt his body. Each time this happens, Yi Xichen will be alright in a few days, as though nothing had happened. However, Zhangsun Zijun always has a serious and responsible attitude so he took Yi Xichen in his arms, ready to take him to see the Medicine Hall’s Elder.
Yi Xichen felt frightened. Zhangsun Zijun must be joking! Putting a hand on his stomach… what child is he talking about? He’s a man, where would he get a child to plug into his stomach?! And if there truly was a child inside, where would it come out?!
“Haha.” Yi Xichen suppressed his laughter then put his hands on Zhangsun Zijun’s forehead. “Zijun, do you have a fever?”
Zhangsun Zijun’s iceberg face wasn’t funny, it was very frightening. The most scary thing about it was that Zhangsun Zijun looked serious, as though he wasn’t joking at all!!!
Zhangsun Zijun didn’t like this physical contact. Every time Yi Xichen put his cool hand on any part of Zhangsun Zijun’s body, it was like adding fuel to the fire in his nether regions. Although he didn’t like this feeling, he couldn’t restrain it. Once things started, they would spend the whole day in bed. He looked down at Yi Xichen and said coldly, “Don’t play with fire.”
Yi Xichen: “…”
“Zijun! Zijun! Zhangsun Zijun!” Yi Xichen struggled to jump out of Zhangsun Zijun’s arms. If the other disciples and elders in the Heavenly Sword Sect door saw Zhangsun Zijun walking around carrying Yi Xichen, he wouldn’t know how to face them.
“I was wrong. I know I was wrong! I won’t tease you again!” Yi Xichen retreated as he apologized. He knew that he must have annoyed Zhangsun Zijun by teasing him with his frivolous words. That must be why he came up with such a way to retaliate against him!
Zhangsun Zijun looked at Yi Xichen with an expression of uncertainty on his face: “Tease me? You lost our child. Such a serious thing, you did it to tease me?”
Goosebumps broke out all over Yi Xichen’s body. Now he knows that a terrible thing it is when the iceberg face starts to joke. If he ever becomes the head of the sect, he must make a new rule: People who aren’t able to joke around properly will absolutely not be allowed to joke!
“You cried and cried and asked me to give you a child!” Zhangsun Zijun took a deep breath then sighed in anger. “You said that if you had a baby then your life as a man would be complete!”
“****! You still aren’t finished!” Yi Xichen was about to collapse. Don’t keep saying that he had a child!! Just hearing that inexplicably makes his backside hurt! Ahhhh!!!
At this point, they heard a gentle voice
“Zhangsun Shidi, Yi Shidi, what are you doing?” A person dressed as a disciple walked over.3
Yi Xichen acted like he had just seen his savior arrive. He rushed to grab that person’s arm: “Lu Shixiong, good morning, hahahahahahaha!”
The man who had just arrived was Lu Ziyao. He was the Sword Refining Hall Elder’s most capable disciple. In the Heavenly Sword Sect, there were four divisions, namely: the Sword Refining Hall, Sword Guardian Hall, Sword Cultivation Hall, and Medicine Hall. Other immortal sects were organized in a similar manner. The Heavenly Sword Sect was a sword cultivation sect and the most powerful hall was the Sword Refining Hall. The disciples of the Sword Refining Hall were all dragons and phoenixes, giants among men. The least capable disciples were the ones from the Medicine Hall. Because not everyone was serious about studying alchemy, their alchemy skills were mediocre. Worse, the time they spent studying alchemy also left them less time to practice their sword skills.
Unfortunately, Yi Xichen and Zhangsun Zijun were both disciples of the Medicine Hall. Yi Xichen was sent there because his talent is bad. He was lucky to even be accepted as a disciple of the sect. As for Zhangsun Zijun, he was initially accepted into the Sword Refining Hall. Even there, among the best disciples of the sect, his outstanding talent stood out. However, his character was too proud and he offended the other disciples. Those people schemed to make him violate some sect rules. Thus, he was sent to the Medicine Hall.
Lu Ziyao and Zhangsun Zijun entered the sect at the same time. After spending some time at Sword Refining Hall, he recognized Zhangsun Zijun’s talent. In the past ten years, there has been a world of difference in their ranks in the sect but Lu Ziyao still showed a lot of consideration towards Zhangsun Zijun.
In the original novel, Lu Ziyao was a gentle and elegant person, with a warm and genial personality4 that made him one of the most popular characters in the story. He helped Zhangsun Zijun and Yi Xichen train. Apart from the two main characters, Lu Ziyao was the most popular character.
However, in the world of the fanfic …
Lu Ziyao was shocked and flattered by Yi Xichen’s extraordinarily enthusiastic greeting: “Hmm? Good morning, Yi Shidi. Good morning, Zhangsun Shidi.”
In order to alleviate the embarrassing situation, Yi Xichen desperately tried to think of a topic to talk about with Lu Ziyao. Luckily, he was outgoing so after a while he had put what just happened out of his mind.
Lu Ziyao patted him on the shoulder and said softly: “The two of you should diligently train your sword skills. In ten days, the disciples of the four halls will compete in the Sword Assembly. The winner can get the five elemental spirit stones that we just retrieved by the masters from Tianyu. With your abilities, you should be able to get a share.”
Yi Xichen immediately said: “That’s for sure!”
He was currently designing an interesting machine that he needed high-grade gold spirit stones to make. This time he has to find a way to win the competition.
Lu Ziyao noticed that Zhangsun Zijun was just standing there calmly without talking: “What’s up with Zhangsun Shidi? He seems to be in a bad mood. Yi Shidi, you haven’t been bullying him, right?”
Yi Xichen had relaxed a lot now so his true nature was exposed again. Mischievously, he put his arms around Lu Ziyao’s shoulders, pretending to be intimate with him, and joked: “Zijun saw us together and he was jealous.”
“Hmph!” Zhangsun Zijun snorted and he lifted his nose up to the sky. “I’m not jealous!5 Hmph!”
Yi Xichen and Lu Ziyao: “…”
It was as though a cold wind blew. Yi Xichen and Lu Ziyao shuddered at the same time.
Today the wind was a bit noisy. Today Zhangsun Zijun was a bit tsundere.6 Is this still the cautious and reserved Zhangsun Zijun? Such a clumsy denial that immediately revealed what he was trying to hide, what’s going on?!7
In order to reduce the awkwardness of the situation, Yi Xichen laughed hollowly: “Lu Shixiong, you see, Zijun has learned how to say one thing while meaning another.”8
“Hmph! I never say one thing while meaning another! Hmph!”
Three people: “…”
Not only were Yi Xichen and Lu Ziyao petrified, Zhangsun Zijun also wanted to dig a hole and bury himself in it. Even if he wanted to snort like that, why did he always snort twice?!
The poor protagonist didn’t know that, in order to increase the story’s popularity, the crazy fanfic writer made Zhangsun Zijun a “super jealous person”9 and “as long as it involved emotional issues, he is 100% tsundere.”
The former Zhangsun Zijun didn’t think that there was anything wrong with this. Furthermore, the standard routine was that after he acted tsundere, Yi Xichen, the overly sensitive and coy shou would start crying and crying, saying things like: “You didn’t love me at all. You lied to me. You’re cruel. I’m so pitiful. I’m useless. I’m lonely. I’ll go to my fall back guy10 for comfort.” Then Yi Xichen would run away. Later, with an evil little smile, Zhangsun Zijun would take back that little shou and push him down in bed for three days and three nights. Afterwards, they would act as though nothing had happened.
But at this moment, Zhangsun Zijun couldn’t escape the “100% setting” and his embarrassing disease flared up in front of these two normal people.
“Zhangsun Shidi, you …” Lu Ziyao, puzzled and embarrassed, asked: “Are you feeling ill?’
“Hmph! I’m not ill! Hmph!”
Suddenly, the whole world was silent.
- Oh my gosh, it’s an extreme tsundere seme! Zhangsun Zijun is so funny!
- If you use the NU forums, why don’t you head on over to the announcement thread and maybe tell people that you enjoyed this story? I would to get a few more people reading this project.
- Thanks for reading and please do leave a comment if you can. Ahem, I currently lack an editor so I would appreciate it if you could tell me if there are any errors. I hope you enjoyed this chapter.
- Just a way of saying that he is super fertile and easily gets pregnant.
- I’m unsure what is happening here in the raws. Either Zijun is talking to no one in particular (since these are his thoughts) or he is complaining internally to Xichen. Or maybe he’s cursing god (the author) for being so irrational in making Xichen miscarry so many times.
- I don’t understand the entire thing. 一名穿着弟子服胸襟三道白的弟子走了过来. Something about three white (something) on his lapel.
- 暖男 – literally “sunshine boy”
- ”I’m not eating vinegar” – eating vinegar just means jealous
- It’s literally tsundere. The Chinese also watch anime so they use words like “tsundere” too.
- 此地无银三百两 – 300 silver taels not hidden here. If one were to say that, obviously people would know that there are 300 silver taels hidden there. Therefore the meaning is that by denying something, a person made it obvious that it’s true.
- 口是心非 – mouth says yes, heart no.
- 醋坛子 – a jar of vinegar
- 备胎 – spare tire. A person that someone keeps in reserve in case their main relationship partner breaks up or quarrels with them.